I WANT TO BE A MISSIONARY—WELL, MAYBE  (1350 words)

(analyzes the “rigors” of missionary life)

by Deb Brammer

 

[uses a boy and girl puppet; props: “noodles” made from strings or rubber bands and fastened together so that they can be taped to look like they are coming from a back pocket, signs that say “day one”, “day two”, “day three,” and “day four.”]

 

(This script can be changed to adapt to your situation. “missionary conference” can be changed to “camp” or “VBS.” The days may be changed to days of the week that correspond to your situation.)

 

(Hold up a sign that says “Day One.” Sadie enters and rests her head on the stage as if lying down. Then Sam enters from the opposite direction.)

 

SAM: Sadie, I’m back. I just got back from the missionary conference. It was so exciting! Too bad you had to have the chicken pox.

 

SADIE: Yeah. I’m feeling better, but Mom says I have to stay home for a whole week. Maybe she’s afraid I’ll give them to the missionaries.

 

SAM: Yeah. Just think if they took your chicken pox to Africa and Norway and Japan. Pretty soon the whole world would have chicken pox, and it would all be your fault.

 

SADIE: (stands up) Unless those missionaries are going to go to the mission field really soon, I think they’d be done with the chicken pox before then.

 

SAM: I guess you’re right. The missionary from Norway spoke tonight and I decided I’m going to be a missionary to Norway when I grow up.

 

SADIE: Why would you want to be a missionary to Norway?

 

SAM: Missionaries to Norway get to snow ski to school.

 

SADIE: I thought you said you were going to go to Norway when you grew up.

 

SAM: I did. So what?

 

SADIE: If you go to Norway when you grow up you won’t need to go to school anymore.

 

SAM: Well…my kids can ski to school. (moves back and forth across the stage as if pretending to ski) I’ll just ski other places. They get lots of snow in Norway and they ski lots of places. Not only that, but the sun shines most of the time. The missionary said people call parts of Norway “the land of the midnight sun.” So I’m going to go to Norway and ski all around town in the sun every day.

 

SADIE: But if the sun shines all the time, why doesn’t the snow melt?

 

SAM: I don’t know. Maybe they have special snow there that doesn’t melt. Won’t that be great? Skiing around in the sun at midnight?

 

SADIE: I think you have a problem. Our cousins in Alaska said it is light there almost all day long in the summer, but it’s dark most of the time in the winter. What if Norway is dark all day in the winter? Are you sure you want to go to Norway?

 

SAM: Well I don’t know. Maybe I’ll ask the missionary about it tomorrow night.

 

(Sam exits. Hold up a sign that says, “Day Two.” Sadie lays her head on the side of the stage. Sam enters.)

 

SAM: Sadie, Sadie, Guess what? When I grow up I’m going to be a missionary to Africa! They have really cool snakes in Africa!

 

SADIE: (jumping up, scared) Yuck! I hate snakes!

 

SAM: They have big snakes and little snakes and medium snakes. You can go right out into your yard and catch them all the time! I can hardly wait!

 

SADIE: Aren’t you afraid?

 

SAM: No. I’ll buy me a big elephant gun. (holds arms up and head down as if holding a gun and moves slowly forward) With an elephant gun I can shoot any snake as long as he’s not bigger than an elephant. I don’t think they have snakes bigger than elephants, so …

 

SADIE: So you’re not afraid?

 

SAM: Not me. I’ll take my elephant gun and shoot me a great big snake and then I’ll skin him and bring him back to show everyone in America. You should see the snake skin the missionary has. It must be six feet long!

 

SADIE: Is that all you plan to do in Africa? Just shoot snakes?

 

SAM: Oh, that’s not all I can do. I’ll be a doctor and save people’s lives. Then when they come and thank me for saving them I’ll tell them to get saved and they’ll be so glad I saved their lives, they’ll do anything I tell them to do.

 

SADIE: Good. I just have one question.

 

SAM: What is it?

 

SADIE: Let’s say someday you’re out in the jungle with an African and suddenly he gets horrible, awful appendicitis. What would you do?

 

SAM: I’d take his appendix out.

 

SADIE: How?

 

SAM: (mimicking action as he says them) Well, I’d cut him open with my knife, yank out his appendix, pull him back together, and sew him up with a needle and thread.

 

SADIE: OK. Let’s say you’re out in the jungle with an African and he gets horrible, awful appendicitis. (mimics next three actions as she says them)You cut him open, yank out his appendix, and hold him together. But before you can thread your needle, you see a deadly, six foot snake. What would you do?

 

SAM: Shoot him with my elephant gun.

 

SADIE: But what if the snake is lying on your elephant gun?

 

(Silence.)

 

SADIE: Well, what would you do?

 

SAM: (after a pause) I think I’m going to be a missionary to Japan.

 

(Sam exits. Hold up a sign that says “Day Three.” Sadie lays head on side of stage. Sam enters.)

 

SAM: Sadie, I’m back. The missionary to Japan spoke tonight. It was so exciting! When I grow up I’m going to go to Japan and eat with chopsticks.

 

SADIE: (standing up) What are you going to eat?

 

SAM: Sweet and sour pork and moo goo gai pan.

 

SADIE: What’s “moo goo gai pan?”

 

SAM: I don’t know, but I bet you eat it with chopsticks.

 

SADIE: What if “moo goo gai pan” is (leans forward and says in nasty voice) “fish eye soup with pig intestines?”

 

SAM: Well…if it is, I guess I’d eat the intestines with my chopsticks and drink the soup out of the bowl. But I don’t think “moo goo gai pan” is fish eye soup. With a name like “moo goo” it’s probably made of baby cows.

 

SADIE: Last time when went to a Chinese restaurant we had sweet and sour pork and moo goo gai pan. But that was Chinese food, not Japanese. I read a book about Japan once. It said in Japan they eat raw fish and eels and lots of seaweed.

 

SAM: They must eat something normal. In fact, the church is having a Japanese dinner tomorrow night. I’ll go and tell you what they eat.

 

(Sam exits. Hold up the sign that says, “Day Four.” Sadie rests head on side of stage. Sam enters.)

 

SADIE: Well, how did the Japanese dinner go?

 

SAM: I don’t know what some of the stuff was, but they had noodles.

 

SADIE: (standing up) Noodles sound good.

 

SAM: I thought so, too until I took some. They looked good, but they were cold. The missionary said in Japan they eat cold noodles all the time.

 

SADIE: So how were they?

 

SAM: Slippery. They kept falling off my chopsticks. I thought I’d better eat them so the missionary didn’t feel bad. After a while they announced that the meeting was going to start and I still couldn’t make my chopsticks pick them up.

 

SADIE: So what did you do?

 

(Sam turns around. Noodles hang from his back pocket. Sadie leans around to see them better.)

 

SADIE: You put them in your pocket??

 

SAM: Well, at least they’re not cold anymore.

 

SADIE: Sam, are you sure you ought to be a missionary when you grow up?

 

SAM: I don’t know, Sadie. It sounded easy when the missionaries told about it, but now I’m not sure. At the next missionary conference it’s my turn to get the chicken pox.

 

(Sam and Sadie exit.)

 

[Follow this puppet show with a discussion of why missionaries go to the mission field. Finding a fun place to live is not the most important thing. God helps them to learn to do new things and gives them a love for their new country.]